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The Freedom To Live Rough by Tigerbomb

by Doc Pickles

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1.
MATTER AT ALL Ill at ease in a passive tune I remember after all, Lost at sea like a wayward tuna the be all and end all, Thoughts return but the plans have changed like a farm in urban sprawl, Barn a wall to the raging tides of strip malls in the wall, So I return to where the thought began and cue the ball re-fall, Let the shot ring out in space and ring the crystal ball of matter at all, does it matter? Matter at all, does it matter at all? Does it matter at all? Shuffle off under stars that shine to the point of dots in space, Ferry through to the island in the sun that beats the waves, Every step that I’ve taken leads me back to here today, Look back on the journey taken, went the other way of matter at all, does it matter? Matter at all, does it matter at all? Does it matter at all? Matter at rest is a dish best served cold, Matter gets pushed and matter gets pulled, Matter gets twisted, shaped to an O, But matter is not what’s put in the bowl. I look through these eyes in space who can see just blighted colour, But up in my imagination I see something other, I don’t have a pantone that can echo what I mutter To the mirror of the matter to my sister to my brother To the cells who hold the parachute together Closer to each other, close matter at all, does it matter? Matter at all, does it matter at all? Does it matter at all? This can strike at any time when memories uncage me, Connect me to the timeless time or otherwise engage me, Release the shackles in my conscious mind that frame me Into just the vassal not the power raging through the channel, for that matter does it matter at all, does it matter? Matter at all, does it matter at all? Does it matter at all?
2.
FROM MY LAZYBOY I AM DISGUSTED From my lazyboy I am disgusted by these barnacles that have become encrusted by the images poured in my head I can only ignore when I blink but how long has it been since I blinked? I can’t stop to think. Carry me off in the currents of history, letting the waves of the sea wash over me, I’m hoping to make ten percent of the proceeds a tithing to God or the bloody Red Cross. Carry me off to the side as the truckers drive by, RVs and rentals and flags going by, unleashing of the Nihilists, a drop in the bucket am I, oh my. It’s not in the news where the truth is the lie or the star, the truth is the first casualty of war, like the fly that was found stuck in the custard, from my lazyboy I am disgusted, an outrage, an outrageous message, a board with a nail in it! Stay in line you’ll be fine we have time and your spine. No you can’t tune it out any longer, yeah the message it will neve3r be stronger: Don’t be a stranger to your brother any longer.
3.
4.
SPACE MANAGEMENT In light of morning at break of dawn these days’ forewarning met with a yawn Too many portents to daydream signposts in a cone, Tonight’s dictations ordered through awoken poems close to home but under the cosmic dome Space management at dawn’s spun ascent, sun blocks the heaven sent compliment that makes us all inconsequent. Repeated spins where cycles in predictable repeatings can never quite repeat the moment twice can never two times stand but in the planners’ plan space management – it’s fantastic! A fantasy spins over me But up and down my spine my soul can still count the time when space turns blue as brine when we hear AM sunshine! Space management AM sunshine Day’s glove compartment Lock away our time Throw away the key if that’s where you need to be.
5.
DREAM SITUATION I think I’m having a dream situation as I sing, with you in it just like a parrot that preens adulation when you bring it to a mirror speak it clearer, slow dictation, quit reflections I’ll see you later, I think I’m having a dream situation, I think I’m having a slow thermal meltdown where I dream with you in it I think I’m having a dream situation What I think I make real, I think I’[m having a dream divination, these archetypes are what I deal, I think I’m having a slow thermal meltdown where I dream with you in town. What if the war was on and nobody came? Just the self-appointed leaders, some brass knuckles, and chains, Would they head on home too or face the devil? Leave the empty field to the next level? I think I’m having a dream situation I think I’m having a dream situation. We moved all night to another plan Got all the way past Uzbekistan, Yeah we dynamite in a caravan, Yeah we bang away like attention spans in a dream situation I think I’m having a dream situation. On an alley-oop to a dead and a pan, when all I want is a Yucutan start over like sixty-five year plan when a mil won’t do comet watering can in a dream situation. What finish line? We don’t cross there no more, To get the ribbon line someone had to get there before, And the biggest dupe of all’s the one dancing for being first but the start and end line’s on the same track at the course. Ain’t nobody winning if one of you loses, Ain’t no winners if somebody’s loose, What if the war was on and nobody came? Just the self-appointed leaders, some brass knuckles, and chains? Would they head on home too or face the devil? Leave the empty field to the next level?
6.
Pastposting 03:04
PASTPOSTING What’s up below the state lines? Here not alone when the fur flies, This is all drowned in blue to the tide to the moon, this is uptown close to you, live like royalty looking out for ribbons in malls. Let alone through the sun, the bird calls: Stay away! Come to me! Walk on by! Walk this way! End regality things to do! Plates spun on sticks, can you handle it? Trees arms up all sway in time to the breeze like seaweeds at sea, down the forest through the pathways that lead, spiders have left no webs to stop me, up on the riptide the sticks in eyes bully over rover separation between sea and sky, land and air, life and earth, Often they go past the post to sing pastposting, Often they go to the deepest night, watch the ghost car, make a wish that disappears from the pier in the air in doras and flying fish, No winds in water, no trap door, two sides to life, one way to go to get more, Heaped on the plate all the words you say, words that go, images know, first past the post! No translation reigned these days all the pictures say it the same, moving through the landscape no difference to you these days, Place where shadows grow to the vast indecision, to carry you unbade bed of decision Pastposting, look out below!
7.
Crocodile 04:32
8.
THE DRIVE TO FORTY-FIVE I lost it all, bet on a forest to grow but it wasn’t fall that I saw or growth that I sensed in conventional sense, only the roads named for trees survived, I’ve gone outside side side with all my pride pride pride and now my horse has gone I need a ride ride ride I’m on the drive drive drive to forty five five five but when the context broke a bee that needs no hive back on the fourth of May, and on the four-twenty, and back on eight eight eight save the day light the way well where meet we have and we set foot in the grave though I’d rather that we tried to stay alive live live I’m on the drive drive drive to forty five five five as all the days slipped away from the calendar page I’m on the next train in the ventricle of the arterial parked on a parkway in the night when all I want to do is drive and as an owl call comes by the waterfalls of the conservation undeveloped shoulder to the highway it says “hoot hoot hoot I’m gonna noise pollute all you losers at the wheel” and I sigh sigh sigh cos one day i know I’m gonna die I’m on the drive drive drive to forty five five five and I could honk and cry but it won’t change the time I’m on the drive drive drive to forty five five five We should take this back outside, you’re howling at the wrong moon. Well there’s a rush up attraction on the roadlit side where the ghosts of old along the prophets told and into every coatman’s snicker my resolve was getting thicker and so was I, I, I, drive on the drive drive drive to forty five five five and oh what a lonely boy was I, I lost it all all all, bet on the forest to grow tall but saw it wasn’t fall i saw or growth that I sensed in conventional sense, only the roads named for trees survived, I’m on the drive drive drive to forty five five five I’m on the drive on the drive I’m on the drive drive drive I’m on the drive drive drive to forty-five.
9.
My Ford 04:04
MY FORD Well here it is, I never thought I’d make the levy, never got a fair shake but I put out for as long as I can remember it’s me behind they all gave up on, the chosen son he’s got the run on the unit, he’s out in the car, won’t talk to you but I’m on it, we’re all opposable thumbs and unbelievably smug but i put out oh I did I put out and I see who’s willing? If it’s illing we’ll make a killing, and though there’s people I’ve been trying to love they’re not the people I’ve been trying to believe they’re not the people I need, they’re not the people who need me, we’re all opposable thumbs and unbelievably smug but i put out oh I did I put out and I see this is not a misprint we are in the thick of it and you’re me let me be and though there’s loves I’ve been keen to impress I just won’t stick with it unless Doug comes out in the car to confess to confess it’s encroyment how everything has changed for me It’s not like I can remember I concede I’m concussed and in time we’re delirious you know i believe it. We’re all opposable thumbs and unbelievably smug but i put out oh I did I put out and I see I put out I put out I put out I put out I put out I put out My ford need fix or repair daily.
10.
THE DIRTY WATER Oh jumbafish you’re always running, don’t you wish that you could stop sometime? But even then the river flows, and the dirty water pulls you along with it, jumbafish. Ah jumbafish up at the apex of the infinite in finite senses, you delight in taking off the mask of the light that you already blinds, so never mind the clutter, the threats that they utter when you held up the mirror blind and blinked to them the message in your mind thick through pitter putter in the shine of the unmanifested senses, jumbafish, jumbafish, jumbafish, Ah jumbafish, jumbafish, when your mother called when you woke up it was twenty-five years you got broke and bald but the infinite called you back like it was a landline time and messages you sent got no reply eventually in the scheme of it neither did I. Ah jumbafish you wish you wish you wish Jumbafish you wish you wish you wish, jumbafish when will you get your wish and to stand on the land like your bretheran still standing did but that worm on the hook tastes so sweet when you look with your mind’s eye behind in the dark it’s the shadow of the witch. She won’t come for you of her own volition it’s all up to you chasing for this nutrition you’re the one who makes the choice and every time you do you choose that witch every time. Ah jumbafish, you took the hook every time. Every time you did, ah jumbafish. Ah jumbafish.
11.
Ishtar's Egg 02:06
ISHTAR’S EGG Parted the chords with breath apart from cadres of codependancy Celebrate something you’ve found now go eat your cream egg Nothing to see here nothing to purchase home-bound parade I’ll never find Ishtar’s egg not if I have any more credit note left to vibrato one final notarized copy of my final shekel tickity-boo to the tacit indifferent staccato can’t get to dollarama to get a candle to light at night, oh well all I need now is an outage of Amazon prime proportions dole out a last of a warehouse dealer’s portion I can still generate garbage just by being a dreg I’ll never find Ishtar’s egg. Draining the swamp of mallory malarchy, a cause left to sell but it’s all on the shelf nothing to sell but a brand, but still it’s on me, still so much useless garbage to sell. Indifferent to the flash of light that propagates I’ll never look for Ishtar’s egg again, I’ll never look for Ishtar’s egg again, I’ll never look for Ishtar’s egg again. La la la la.
12.
Mown 04:34
MOWN As I mow, spoiling seeds’ deception, soothe straight lines, solid grids, safe reflections, and I know things will never be this perfect since I go Mother Nature is creeping in. Oh I know that I got a place that’s in it never perfected, always striving, sometimes trying, as I mow I can see all things reflected truths and deceptions, and it is good, I play detective with my preconceptions. Get to know all that’s in all places, as I mow it’s to open spaces, not to reap, life to grow, and I know things will never be perfection, every step away’s a deeply flawed reflection. Oh where I go over oceans or in my mind as I mow where I am I am I. You all know space here you all for, it’s not the tallest tree that’s canopy, it’s one and all. Me and you, you and me, we together, together we. As I mow thoughts come into my mind, complete themselves and go, and I’m left behind. So I go scribe what I remember, though what I don’t know what it means now but I try to transcribe now what I recall.
13.
I’M GONNA LIVE IN A TENT DOWN BY THE RIVER I’m gonna live in a tent down by the river, I’m gonna hold my coat the footman’s snicker, I’m gonna hole in an RV at Galleria, I’m gonna eat the loss, regret the feel, I’m gonna crash on a couch where my friend’s living, I’m gonna give the thanks and take the giving, I’m gonna get a massage and sleep on the table, I’m gonna twist that myth into a fable, Oh I’m gonna move to a future condo development, I’m gonna suck the sustenance out from the elements, I’m gonna work real hard watch it slip away, away! I was gonna eat but the pocket got ripped away, away! I’m gonna sleep in an underpass out by the highway, I’m gonna move but first I need a place to stay, I’m gonna pitch me a tent in the sculpture gallery, I’m gonna diagnose that hundredth malady, I’m gonna sleep in a bag in a lot where the dogs pee, I’m gonna find that X at rainbow’s B, I’m gonna tell the truth when the park police take me, I’m not gonna look down on the ones beneath me, Oh I’m gonna try to live up to the people who beat me, then I’m gonna go up north where the midnight heat be, and I’m gonna love every grate where the subway heat be, then I’m gonna eat the blackflies that come to eat me, eat me. Eat me! I’m gonna get a disease in the shelter they put me, I’m gonna let down gently those who need me, I’m gonna go where opportunity could be, I’m gonna bite the boot that tries to feed me, I’m gonna leave the hand out to beseech me, I’m gonna snatch each apple I can reach, I’m gonna slip a homily for every homily, I’m gonna sleep like a log in a sandy beach, I’m gonna sleep in the car they left out for holiday, I’m gonna let loose a pet for every peeve, I’m gonna be a temp until Christmas Eve, I’m gonna dry the herb and eat the weed, I’m gonna smoke all the road smokes at bus key, I’m gonna fight the fights but skip the tussles, I’m gonna be that second ship at night, I’m gonna eat the stems of the bullrushes, I’m gonna keep potato free of blight, I’m gonna sing to the moon to pass the night, I’m gonna play the hit then hit repeat, I’m gonna bathe my skin in the morning sunlight, I’m gonna look below for deeper meaning, I’m gonna eat the peach from the stand on the street, I’m gonna beat the dust and swoop the dirt, I’m gonna drop out of school to model in the evening, I’m gonna take the sermon skip what’s preached, I’m gonna dig the ditch below the culvert, I’m gonna screw the nuts and pop the rivets, I’m gonna sleep in a tree where the roots reach, I’m gonna eat my fate in sultry shiver, I’m gonna stand and seal my fate delivered, I’m gonna stuff my shirt so I don’t look thinner, I’m gonna sleep in a tent down by the river.
14.
LA 2005 03:59
LA 2005 LA 2005 living in a tent on the beach by the airport trying to make big I think or just stay alive. Wouldn’t you like to get out on the run? Ground the crew? Under the clock and under the gun? Misconstrue when in alone and covered in and zoomed in to the dots details of life unlived wish I did back in the oughts. Wouldn’t you like to try on another face? Chuck all the pages of day’s waste into the fireplace? Would you rather put on a coat or change a shoe? Put on another face but would it change the view? Don’t like what you see? Bark up the wrong tree, get no answers from me I’m all ready to leave but my bones back in the bed back at home, my soles pace the Tiny West Hollywood bowls! But my bones in the bed back at home my soles pace the Tiny West Hollywood bowls. Wouldn’t you like to get out with some stories to tell? Under the thumbs you’ve been stuck in hell like a fly in a Taco Bell it tolls for you like gum stuck to your shoe day’s gone through: yo quiero living Hell! At the beach at night when I'm alone and still beneath the stars it calls. At the beach in a mental maze for rats’ race to cheese it needs. Planes arrive and depart over me while all the while I try to sleep. Don’t I like what I see? Change the channel change the scene. Such a strange such a strange such a strange God I kneel to. Such a strange such a strange such a strange God I feel you! Wouldn’t you like to get it through? LA 2005 Tiny West Hollywood, trying to make it big I think.
15.
WHEREVER THERE IS LOVE When I was young I gave it away believed love coming back one day but I’m here oh still I wait running out of days so I’m gonna be wherever there is love, Out in the haze of an LED display the floor where lovers play the lovers all away no moves away I wanna be wherever there is love, Oh I wanna be wherever there is love. Latin dance class I take jump on the craze the partnerless list, let fates pair up my face got stuck with an odourous accounting rep named Clay he said “should I lead?” I said “I should probably leave” cos I wanna be wherever there is love. Slippery snake, eel, I reel, the hull won’t break unless the jaws of lions take me out to make me feel a lifelessness on how to do two way for when love comes along to take me to a zoo but I’m not use for anything just taxidermy oh I’m gonna be wherever there is love, now I’m up on the wall next to a buffalo head and a full trophy case and I’ll be feeding you account for the rest of your days. Oh I wanna flee wherever there is love Oh I still believe wherever there is love Oh I wanna be wherever there is love wherever there is love.

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Recorded between spring equinox and autumn equinox, 2022 in Toronto by Emmet Rogan and Doc Pickles. Have a nice day.

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released September 22, 2022

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Doc Pickles Toronto, Ontario

Tigerbomb are Emmet Rogan and Hugh Allen with Doc Pickles. From Toronto. Yeah.,

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